This is a story of two women. They were very different. One wore saree all the time. The other was more comfortable in jeans. One, barely literate, the other, highly educated. One never saw a town before she was married, the other was a true blue town bred. They both laughed a lot!
Punita lives in an area that can not even be called a slum. It is a makeshift house with polythene sheets doing most of the needful, that is when they can. On nights with high speed wind, they can not hold together any more. Punita stays up tending to the sheets then with her three children, now two as one of them is married. The husband helps when he can. When he is in a state to tend to anything. Punita grew up in Rural Uttar Pradesh. Never went to school. Her only dream was to get married and a house to call her own. A smiling and hardworking woman, she got married as a 14 year old. Her husband worked in a big town, they told her. She could not fathom what awaited her in that big city. She, however, adjusted quickly and started working day and night. She would wake up early in the morning to clean cars, work in people's homes, wash dishes, sweep floors, wash clothes, folding the dried ones among many other things. People loved her for her smiling nature. The only problem was her husband drank too much and would pick up a quarrel now and then. She would get badly beaten up on those nights. She did not have time to nurse her hurt. She would wake up early and start her daily chores. It was good that she had these diversions. It made the going easier.
Seema grew up thinking she will stand on her own feet. It never occurred to her that she could just be a homemaker or a house, as it was called then. In college she said, royally, "Even if my marital family does not need my income, I would still like to earn. I love gifting so much!" She did not know she had it in her head somewhere that her marital family would not need her earning! Or she did not recognize. She grew up in a family where the father earned and the mother tended the house. She wanted to work but did not think much about income. Although her family situation was otherwise. Her parents did not save much and they did not have much parental property, these made it important that she earned to support them. She did not think of this while struggling to make the ends meet in her highly subsidized college hostel. She was married even before her first salary reached home. She got her salary in cash for the first year. Later when she started getting cheques, it used to be deposited in her husband's account. It was a joint account with her Husband as the principal holder. She could not care less. She loved her husband. Her husband loved her. They had a wonderful time together. Not that there was no friction, but she learnt to carefully avoid them. She was a keen learner.
Punita's husband sent money home to his parents regularly. This was a cause of tension between the couple. Punita resented it as she clearly worked more, earned more and saw her three children in need as this money was sent home. Whatever she saved over months, bit by bit, in her saree's folds, in the old tin box, in the pot near idol of Laxmi, would be either found or she would be beaten black and blue until it was taken out and given to her husband, either for his regular drinks or to be sent to his parents. His parents owned land and some silver. Punita was regularly threatened that this silver would be sold if she did not part with her money. She thought her children's future needs depend on saving that silver and complied. Once she had put together Rs 10,000, a princely sum in the beginning of year 2000. Her husband wanted to send all that home. Every single penny. When she tried to take away Rs 100 from it saying she wanted to buy some savory for her children to eat, her husband threw all the money on the floor and threatened her of dire consequences. He said, he would leave her. He would call her father and in front of him, he would denounce her forever. She could then take her Rs 100 and her three children with her. She cried the whole night but gave away all her money. She cried and sought forgiveness for daring to keep the money. She knew her father would not have kept her anyway. Next day when she went to her usual houses to do the dishes, one of the "madam"s asked about her wounds. She was asked then to get some pictures from home and this madam helped her open a bank account. A joint account with madam at first and within a month an account of her own. She put every bit of money that she saved in it. She did not know how to read and write but she had a sharp brain. When another madam started a literacy class she joined and learned fast. She can now read her passbook and know how much is saved there. Her husband can not. A few years later, her elder daughter took out the passbook out and read loudly, "Mother has 50,000 in her bank!" Her husband heard it. He asked her to part with the money for his sister's wedding but this time she did not. He beat her with bricks. She had a big wound on her forehead. She did not know from where she came up with this logic but shouted, "Kill me! All the money will be taken away by the government. You will not get it all the same." The next morning she was threatened that the silver would be sold. She could not care less this time. "Go ahead!" she said.
Seema meanwhile gave birth to a daughter. She was too happy to fulfill her parents in law's ambition to become grandparents, However, she really struggled to keep her job. With a small child, in a town where much help was not available for women who worked outside home, each day presented a new challenge to her. The fact that her daughter did not keep good health only added to her troubles. It put considerable strain on the relationship too. Once she had a big fight with her husband. She wanted to read a book for some time and when she raised her eyes to see, her daughter was given ice cubes to chew on. Ice cubes to an asthmatic! Who does that! She was furious. And threw the glass snatching it away from the child. She shook her child hard and picked her to go to the other room. Book was left where it was. She never looked back at that book for that night turned her life upside down. Her husband came to the room and shut the door. He broke a few things to show how angry he was because how she behaved in front of his parents. Seema tried to smile, "Stop creating a scene!" He snarled baring his teeth. "Its no make belief. Its real. Get out with your daughter from my house. Go back to your father. Do whatever you like but do not show me your face." She was stunned as she heard her much loved husband rambling, "All that I have bought with my money, I would take with me. You can take your daughter." In that dark night, Seema realized for the first time, after 4 years of working outside home and being married, she had nothing to her name. If she really had to leave that night, she did not know how she could have survived. She cried the whole night and begged forgiveness. For what? I do not think she was sure. However, she knew she had to stay there. Her father would not have helped her in any case. It would have only added insult to the injury to get him involved who would have surely brought her back to the same house. She traveled to headquarters for work soon. She asked a male colleague to help her open an account for her. She had no identity proof and no address proof. The bank declined opening an account. Her male colleague suggested the same route. A joint account first and then a single account. Seema put her mind into accounts for the first time. It was the first time she decided to bother about her salary and where it is deposited.
Seema and Punita, two women, and many other women like them, who never meet, never share their stories, who are so different, yet so similar in the lives they live and the lessons they learn about themselves, the people around them and money! May all their stories have a happy ending!
